Des Moines wrap-up

Every athlete accepts that you will have some bad races. Unfortunately, these bad races occasionally occur when you least want them to. This weekend in Des Moines, I experienced one of those races and, needless to say, having a bad race at Olympic Trials is not good timing. As I saw my chance to make the Olympic Team slipping away from me within the first mile of the run, my race mentally ended at that point. What I didn't realize until after the race, however, is that I gave away my position as alternate in addition, a position that should have easily been mine. I can't exactly explain what happened, even though I've replayed the race a thousand times in my head. I started the race with confidence, swam well and was in control on the bike. Within a few minutes of the run, however, something happened mentally and I fought my impulse to quit every step for the remainder of the race. Although I finished in 9th, a very respectable placing at a World Cup, I raced so far below my potential that I can't help but be devastated by the result.

Luckily for me, my family and friends help me keep the race in perspective (thanks to all for your pre-race wishes of luck and post-race buoying!). After all, my goal last year was to make the Olympic Trials and I vastly exceeded my expectations by even being a contender for a position. As I look forward to 2012, I have to remind myself of how far I have come and be excited by the improvements that I have yet to make. While I may not have been ready for Beijing, the lessons that I've learned through the 2008 Trials process will certainly pay off in the long-term.

The Adventure Continues...

In preparation for this weekend's duathlon in Des Moines, I changed my hotel to West Des Moines, did a du-style pre-race tune-up workout yesterday and bought platform duathlon pedals which eliminates shoe changes. I had yet to figure out my outfit (wearing a swimsuit when no water is involved just seems so wrong) when I received the news that the race will most likely be a triathlon once again. Thank goodness. Between my duathlon insecurities (I'm not even sure of the distances involved!) and the Olympic selection mess, my life is greatly simplified by the running of a triathlon. Bill Burke, the race director, and the Hy-Vee staff deserve some nice cold ones post-race after the nightmare they've endured in running this event.

While I'm relieved to know that I will have the opportunity to race this weekend, I admit to having some reservations. After hearing of how deeply lives have been affected in the Midwest by the flooding, it somehow seems inappropriate to be competing in a race in Des Moines. Sport is a luxury, not a necessity. When people have lost their worldly possession and homes to the flood waters, how can I focus on something so inconsequential as triathlon? While I realize that I am doing more than just racing, as I am following a dream, I am painfully aware that my ability to chase that dream is an incredible privilege. Whatever happens this weekend in the race, I'm certain that my surroundings will help ground me and remind me of my great fortune in life.

Oh, Des Moines... *sigh*

Last year at the Hy-Vee World Cup in Des Moines, I had an unpleasant collision with a pedestrian who wandered onto the bike course. I ended up with a fracture in my radial head (aka elbow), an event that proved to be a mixed blessing. While injury is always best prevented, I managed to make the experience one of growth, as I raced the following weekend at the Edmonton World Cup (finishing a career-best 5th, despite searing pain) and proving to myself that I am tougher than I had previously thought. It seems as though Des Moines is once again putting me through the ringer, inconveniently experiencing devastating flooding recently and putting our final Olympic Trials race in jeopardy. Most likely, the race will be run as a duathlon and the Olympic eligibility will be determined by the results of the first two Trials races. As a result, it looks as though I will be first alternate for the Olympic Team.
In the wake of these recent developments, I'm going though a rather trying time. While I realize that I was a long-shot to make the team (I would have to be 1st US at Des Moines), I still had an opportunity to try, now taken away my Mother Nature. Part of my disappointment lies in the fact that I still have something to prove to myself. While I contracted bacterial gastroenteritis in Beijing and just barely managed to finish the race, let alone race well, I recognize the fact that I was neither physically nor mentally ready to make the Olympic Team at that time. In Alabama, I was physically ready but not mentally so, racing too cautiously and scared, not having had the confidence that great results can bring. With a week until the final Olympic Trials race, I am finally at the point where I feel as though I am worthy to be an Olympian. The amount of personal growth that I have experienced in the past few months is invaluable and I look forward to using my burgeoning new confidence in the season to come, as well as in seasons to come and, most importantly, in my post-triathlon life. While I may still have a chance to race next weekend (waters must first recede and have acceptable bacteria levels), I accept this newest challenge that Des Moines is throwing my way.